1:00 AM: Fall asleep after playing 6 hour marathon of Wolfenstein
1:30 AM: Wake up and eat 3 orders of cheese fries...spill some on shirt
1:31 AM: Fall back into fatsleep and dream about not being able to see sailboat in 3D picture at mall
9:00: Roll out of bed and take a massive steaming nuke on the lawn...don't shower...get excited about big day planned staring at 3D picture
9:30: Show up at mall with bag lunch (which is a mysteriously small bag considering...ya know)...wear same shirt as night before
10:00: Eat more cheese fries...spill more on shirt
10:10: Get mad at Brodie and T.S. for interrupting...give them some righteous information on game show stage
11:00: Stare at 3D picture...urinate pants
11:30: Get irritated that children want to look at picture too...laugh at and ridicule small child for saying they saw a schooner...get put in place by 7 year old...feel dumb...ruin Easter for all children within earshot by giving up the gig on the Easter Bunny
12:00: Eat entire lunch in one disgusting inhalation, including bag
12:01-2:30: Alternate between staring at 3D picture and sleepfarting through the afternoon
2:35: See Brenda from 90210...be called a dick...wonder why
3:10: Get uber-frustrated at 3D picture, kick stage, and unknowingly play major role in ruining gameshow...leave mall, stopping at the cookie stand (not in the food court) on the way out
3:30: Get home and take a massive steaming nuke on the lawn
4:00: Eat 12 beef-n-cheddars
4:05: Look up meaning of schooner...feel dumb again
4:05-12:00: Play 8 hours of Wolfenstein
12:00: Pass out face down on floor in same dirty shirt
All Night: Dream of alleged sailboat in 3D picture and get pissed off in sleep
